Ebook , by Oren Jay Sofer
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, by Oren Jay Sofer
Ebook , by Oren Jay Sofer
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Product details
File Size: 2205 KB
Print Length: 298 pages
Page Numbers Source ISBN: 161180583X
Publisher: Shambhala (December 11, 2018)
Publication Date: December 11, 2018
Sold by: Amazon Digital Services LLC
Language: English
ASIN: B07DZG5W9H
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Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
#37,815 Paid in Kindle Store (See Top 100 Paid in Kindle Store)
I have read quite a bit about communication and also about mindfulness, so I wasn’t sure if this book had much to offer me. Turns out, I found this to be a valuable read. I found that the way Sofer clearly and expressively brought a number of ideas (mindfulness, Nonviolent Communication, and somatics) together was a joy. I have encountered the vast majority of the ideas before, but I treasure the way that Sofer brought these ideas together (ideas which are clearly related, but often not combined). I think this stands out above and beyond all the other communication books I have read and highly recommend this to anyone. I will be giving this out as a gift this year.The basic premise is that you have to be open to yourself and to others in order to be able to communicate in the truest and most connected way. This is a practical book and a deeply moving book at the same time, and, indeed, that is rather the point. Safer explains how the way we communicate affects our relationships, including our relationship with ourselves. Running on autopilot is not the best way to relate. We need to understand where we are coming from and where the other person is coming from. Using observations, emotions, needs and requests, we can focus on what is important.Since, at least at the time I am writing this, there is no “look inside†feature, here are the contents:PART 1: The First Step: Lead With Presence1: the center of our lives2: the power of mindfulness3: relational awarenessPART 2: The Second Step: Come From Curiosity and Care4: the blame game5: where are you coming from?6: don’t let the call dropPART 3: The Third Step: Focus On What Matters7: getting down to what matters8: emotional agility9: enhancing empathy and inner resilience10: how to raise an issue without starting a fight11: if you want something, ask for itPART 4: Bringing It All Together12: the flow of dialogue13: running the rapids14: conclusion: charting your courseHighly recommended! This book has the potential to bring much good to your life, IMHO.But that's JustMe
I am a veteran educator and rely on my communication skills to work with students, families and administrators. Delivering messages so they can be heard, and listening to others so they can feel seen and heard is a huge part of my professional existence.If you are interested in deepening your communication and apply mindfulness, self awareness (cognitive, affective and somatic) and concepts from Rosenberg’s Non-Violent Communication, this book is highly recommended.This is a VERY well written book by Oren Jay Sofer. The concepts (Oren refers to them as principles) and teachings are well structured and organized so that you are able to process the concepts multiple times during the book to really grasp and let them sink in. Oren shares contemplative practices that support the communication principles and at the end of the chapters, recaps with bullet points and with mini Q and A’s, further exploring the “what ifs†when applying the practice/principles. The list of Roadblocks to Communication was enlightening as there were some in there that didn’t appear as roadblocks, but looking deeply can get in the way of connecting with others.There is much wisdom and heart in the principles. His “pairing†of Practices (mindfulness related to help build presence, relational awareness, curiosity and care) to apply the principles in communication with others were helpful when I first started. It gave me a felt experience of what my body and mind needed to be when trying out the principles with others.I also enjoyed his direct and accessible style of writing about the concepts/principles, real life anecdotes (relatable, makes all of us Human!) and the meditation practices (guided online) that come with the book.A great book to read with a partner to embark on a journey to strengthen communication, for book clubs or summer reading for those who work closely with people and want to deepen connection with others through empathy and curiosity.âï¸âï¸âï¸âï¸âï¸
I'm a therapist who works with families and communication is literally my bread and butter. That being said I've read no other book that has broke down how to improve my own communication and explained how effective and heart centered communication works as well as this book has. It has concrete practices that I did with my girlfriend over the phone and in person. It helped our own communication get better and really opened up space for us to dive into the deep stuff. The book breaks down in a step by step fashion how to slowly engage in learning and practicing communication better. It opened my heart to really seeing how communication was developed for me at a young age and how I still carry old patterns of communication that were no longer needed. And through practicing some concrete practices I've noticed a huge difference in only a few weeks. If you're looking for a book around improving your own communication in an easy to read yet deeply insightful book, you've found it.
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